Definitions

Neuticles: an artificial replacement for the testicles of neutered pets. According to AP, -The idea, says inventor Gregg A. Miller, is to "let people restore their pets to anatomical preciseness" after neutering, thereby allowing them to retain their natural look and self-esteem. "People thought I was crazy when I started 13 years ago," says the Oak Grove, Mo. entrepreneur. But he has since sold more than 240,000 pairs (a few of which went on prairie dogs, water buffalo, and monkeys). "Neutering is creepy. But with Neuticles, it's like nothing has changed."- Neutering is creepy? And fake testicles for animals isn't?

13265.47: The current Dow Jones Industrial average, and the lowest it's been in nearly five years, due in part to a bad sub-prime housing lending market (who woulda thunk that in a pinch, the sub-prime market would bust? need a crystal ball for that one....) and negative sentiment in spite of decent forecasts. What does this say to me? If I had money, I'd be snapping up Netflix stock, that's what.

The Underdog: which is right where he wants to be. Sen. John McCain is back in the role of the underdog, railing against party excesses and partisanship. I personally like this McCain much better than the party front-runner the press was touting him as. I doubt if he'll win in the primaries, because, like Howard Dean for Democrats, McCain isn't 'safe' enough for most Republicans. And by most, I mean the ones that count - the big donors. So, I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride, and look forward to hearing more statements like this from him: "It's getting harder to do the work of the Lord in the city of Satan."

Jailtime: how much time should a woman get for having an abortion? The latest Newsweek asks this question based on a video shot by a man at a protest outside of an abortion clinic. As one might expect, most of the answers were not answers at all, as most people who actively protest against abortion are idealists who - in general - have a hard time thinking logically about their position. So, if abortion is illegal, how much time does the woman get? Recent interpretations and Supreme Court judgments (I'm looking at you, Justice Kennedy) do not hold the woman responsible at all, preferring instead to place all blame on the doctor. You can't have it both ways. Either you criminalize the woman who is said to be committing murder (that IS the rhetoric) or, you realize there will always be those who make the choice to abort their baby regardless of the law or the availability of decent medical facilities. So, jail time and botched abortions? Or the legality of a practice I'm sure most people, even those who are pro-choice, would agree is not a choice that should be considered a woman's first.