Wednesday, January 30, 2008


... you know you always wanted a pocket sized ninja.

Internet privacy

There are a number of oxymorons that I could make jokes about - military intelligence, honest politician, and so on - but by far my favorite is internet privacy. Someone once told me that unless you wouldn't mind seeing anything you put up on the internet on a billboard on the road entering the town in which you live, you shouldn't put it up. I have taken this to heart, and while there may be things that I would prefer not to be put up, there's nothing that would be in any way titillating or otherwise. Some may call this boring. I call it prudent.

One of the perks of my job is the unique variety of things people buy and the information one gets by seeing someone's purchase history. I believe I already mentioned the GCs sent to dominatrices. The men buying these would probably be horrified to know of someone knowing about this. There have also been sex toys, various explicit books and videos, and a truly strange little item called a "Keinohrhase" or "Rabbit with no ears." It's a relationship tool.

Anyway, this was all sparked by one of the orders I came across today. The customer's Yahoo! profile was a picture of his junk. One of my colleagues has gotten a picture of testicles before, but this was a first for me.

All I have to say is this: WHY would you ever post a picture of yourself - especially if you aren't precisely impressive - on the internet for ANYONE to see?

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

I need an iPod

I'm getting really bored at work. I check the news every few minutes. I answer email. I write on my blog. It's not as though there's not work. It's just that the work there is is rather mind-numbing and one needs these little mental breaks to keep from going stark raving mad. I think I might go make myself some hot apple cider shortly.

All of my colleagues either have an mp3 player or they smoke. I don't intend to take up smoking, so I guess I need an mp3 player. Maybe this will help with the need to make sure that my brain doesn't turn to a giant pile of applesauce inside my skull.

On another note, I watched Batman and Robin: The Movie last night, and it was hilarious. Very dry humor, absolutely obnoxious dialogue, and great tights. "Holy Polaris, Batman!" - very funny. It's very much in the 60's science/technology show mentality, though - I think Star Trek and Batman have more in common than I thought.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Funny orders

One of the most fun parts of my job is viewing the orders made by people. Sometimes, the mix is just WRONG, as is the case frequently. Once I wanted to cancel an order of 80's music, hot pink dolls, and relationship book based purely on bad taste. But we're not allowed to do that.

My favorite orders by far are the gift cards purchased for dominatrices. Some of these women are making bank! The gift cards are typically between 100-500euro, and there are generally multiple payments. The best are when you can see the progression of various dominas on a particular account - one man's average was about three months with each one, then he'd move on to the next. Today, I have an order for a 150euro GC and a vacuum cleaner and accessories to be mailed to Lady L. (not writing the full name here). I'm really curious if the postman knows who Lady L is, since there's no last names allowed.

It's the little things in life that make things fun. :)

Thursday, January 24, 2008


I have always thought purchasing was so much more of a prepossessing word than buying. Buying has a certain crass connotation to it; whereas purchasing sounds very professional and high in the in-step. This, of course, gives it a certain comic quality as well.

Tomorrow is payday, and it's my payday after working a 52.5hour week and a 54 hour week, so I am looking forward to it. I have already spent every bit of it, though, which is unfortunate, but it's exciting to consider my purchases.

The first is this camera, a Canon EOS 30D for my brother. He is an aspiring photographer, and he currently only has a powershot. Powershot does NOT equal aspiring photographer. So, he's getting a new camera.

The second is for me, I'm getting a bamboo silverware tray and a brushed stainless steel spice carousel. I have been living in my new apartment for going on three months, and haven't yet purchased a silverware tray. Since I hate plastic with a passion, I ended up choosing bamboo and steel, which are, after all, much more attractive anyway. Probably more durable too, since it seems anything made of plastic has shoddy construction.

And thus ends the purchases, because I have to pay rent and pay my mom back for being so generous when my pay didn't quite stretch. But it's certainly been fun shopping!

Friday, January 18, 2008

Hat Week!! Day 5 - Round brim hat

And thus, it ends - this is the last day of hat week. I'm thinking this is a good indication that I need to go shopping for new hats. :)

I bought this hat when I went to Chicago for my cousin Martha's wedding in 2003. My cousin Christina bought the leopard print version - I, being more boring, bought black. I like this hat second best after my beret. It has the benefit of making even very bad hair days good.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Clinton leads with old white people in SC

From an analysis of the latest polls (although... who can tell with them after NH) from SC:

"In the Democratic race, Obama bests Clinton among men (42%-27%), women (39%-34%), African Americans (56%-25%), and voters under 50 (47%-21%). Clinton leads Obama among whites (39%-20%) and those over 50 (39%-35%). In fact, it's worth noting, Obama's third among whites, at 20% with John Edwards garnering 28% of the white vote, 11 points behind Clinton. Edwards is virtually shut out among African-Americans, receiving less than the poll's 5% margin of error."

So, Obama has men, women, young people, and African-Americans; Clinton has whites and old people.

I wish Washington were more important in the primary voting process.

Hat Week!! Day 4 - Fishing hat

Okay, now I'm reaching, because I really don't have many hats. I got this for free when I sent some money to the National Park Service. So now I have a National Park Service fishing hat that I will NEVER wear.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

German comedy titles

Mario Barth - Männer sind Schweine, Frauen aber auch!

(Men are swine, but so are women!)

Mario Barth - Männer sind primitiv, aber glücklich

(Men are Neanderthals*, but happy)

*Neanderthals, also interchangeable with cavemen, primitive, or redneck

Hat Week!! Day 3 - Weird Russian style hat

I like this hat least, mainly because it looks so beautiful all by itself, but somehow, in the act of being placed on my head, it loses all appeal. In fact, it just looks ridiculous. This is why, after more than eight years of having it with my stuff, I never wear it.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Hat Week!! Day 2 - Yellowstone baseball cap

This was one of the many souvenirs we bought on a trip to Yellowstone years ago. This is the perky fast food store clerk look. Course, my hat during my short career at Burger King (one month) was considerably uglier. At least yellow is cheerful.

Monday, January 14, 2008

lost in translation

Ils se marièrent et eurent beaucoup d'enfants (2004)
... aka ...And They Lived Happily Ever After (International: English title)


I was unaware that getting married and having piles of kids was the same as living happily ever after.

Now I know.

Hat Week!! - Day 1 - Beret

My very favorite hat - I've had this hat since high school, and even when I wasn't into hats, I still kept this one.

Friday, January 11, 2008

And now... for something completely different

I work a lot. This week, I've already hit forty hours, and I still have today and tomorrow to go. This is good, though, because I get paid overtime, which I like.

I have decided that, in honor of not having any time to relax anymore, I would have a hat show-and-tell week! I don't actually have more than five hats, so I figured that's just right. So, next week, for each day of the week, I will post a picture of one of my hats while on my head.

Tonight, I get off a little early because I want to go check out the company store. I've been told it's not all baseball caps with logos on it, although a baseball cap with a logo on it would actually be kind of cool, so I want to see what they've got. I've also heard you can buy a laptop for $50 through a sort of raffle thing, but I dunno how much I would want to pay for a used Dell laptop. Save myself the effort and get a new one - they're almost as cheap.

Also tonight, I'm watching a movie. Not Monty Python, although that would be awesome, but Blood Diamond, which showed up via Netflix a while ago, and I haven't watched it yet. I've heard it's good, but you don't want to watch it twice. That's fine, because I'm only renting it. :)

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Change... or experience?

I caught the Democratic debates last night by accident - I usually read about the debates after they're over, since I was out of the country for most of them, and haven't had a TV for the remainder. But, my mom gets basic channels, so I watched them last night. You know what's funny? Richardson actually made a very nice showing, especially for someone who has no hope of winning. He's got a great hope of being a running mate, though - he has a lot of good ideas, and had the best lines of the night.

I am personally undeterred in my support of Obama, who I have supported since early last year (not that it matters in my state, where the candidate will already have been decided by the time I get to vote for him), and am very excited to see that a man with a Kenyan father and the middle name 'Hussein' won the primary in white bread Iowa. That, in itself, would get me excited, if only because it's such a monumental philosophical victory in this country. Of course, I think part of the reason people don't see him based on the color of his skin is that he doesn't act like a stereotypical American black male, he acts like a highly educated Ivy league graduate, which most people respect.

I very much hope that McCain wins in New Hampshire. Romney has spent an absurd amount of money, and has all the corporate interests in his corner, but McCain has spent a miniscule amount in proportion, and has the integrity to back up what he says. I like Romney before he turned into a Republican party android machine. His record as Massachusetts governor showed that he was willing to think for himself and do what the people of Massachusetts wanted. Then he completely re-made himself for this race. I hope other voters are wondering to themselves - who exactly is he? And even if Huckabee won Iowa, his appeal is not broadly based across the country, and in very few places elsewhere could a Southern Baptist minister who wants to 'take' the country 'back for God' win in a Presidential caucus/primary.

It's exciting to watch this race in a way that other races haven't been exciting at all. Voters are tired of establishment candidates (finally!) and are looking elsewhere for answers, so we actually have interesting people winning. I admire and respect Hillary Clinton for what she's accomplished in her life, for her brilliance, and her perseverance. However, I simply disagree with her on a lot of policy issues. I also don't trust someone who is so firmly a part of the Democratic party. Parties work for the benefit of the party; they don't work for the benefit of the American people they're supposed to be serving. While it would be highly gratifying to vote for a woman as president, I think I'll have to content myself for voting for Obama.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Holiday Busy-ness

One of the things I like most about the holidays is how busy I am.

One of the things I like least about the holidays is how busy I am.

My brother came back to visit, so I’ve been spending piles of time with him, and a friend that I haven’t seen in a year a half reconnected, on top of the regular holiday scheduling, plus starting a new job. They’re both flying back to their respective homes tomorrow, I’ve gotten more comfortable in my job, and the holidays are, for all intents and purposes, over. So now I have more time on my hands for working overtime.

This year has been very good for me. I am looking forward to how many great new things I’ll be able to do and try this year. I plan to continue with pottery, take a knitting class, a sewing class, and learn to swim this summer. All I managed this last summer was learning how not to drown with a little training board and how to float – but I was rather proud of that. Next week, I’m signing up for a gym membership and a personal trainer. I’m researching condos for my move in June, and looking longingly at a gorgeous cream brocade Victorian chaise that I know I can’t yet afford.

I hope you all have had wonderful holidays as well and done fun things with people you love.

Ich wünsche euch eine guten Rutsch in neue Jahr!